Wii be Jammin’

TieGuy has me do some interesting workouts. My recovery workouts (done on the weekends) typically include an easy skate, run, or bike; some Yoga; possibly some slideboard or light dryland; and TaeBo or WiiFit or balance board.

Now, the TaeBo/Wii/balance board is probably not something he’d have every skater do; it’s just an attempt to deal with my poor proprioceptive sense, bad balance, and mediocre motor planning. TieGuy, who is a physical therapist in real life, says that the technical term for me is “Motor Moron.” Whatever.

Anyway, I tried the TaeBo, but Billy and I just didn’t get along. Putting aside the part of our disagreement that was undoubtedly my fault (that is, the part that is the reason I was supposed to be doing TaeBo in the first place, and the reason that I sometimes had to play the DVD at half-speed in order to figure out the moves—in other words, my Motor Moronity), there were issues. What particularly got to me (and got me yelling at the DVD) is that Billy would lie to me. “One more set,” he’d say, then he’d start talking about being all that you could be, and somehow he’d end up doing two sets. I just couldn’t deal with Billy. So, I switched to the WiiFit. And it was fun (if I could overlook its occasional gasp of “OH!” when I stepped on it after an overindulgence in pizza). But, after today’s experience, I don’t think I trust my Wii anymore…

I had been shirking my Wii duties for, oh, um, at least 6 months. I had done some balance board stuff, but the Wii…well, I don’t think I’ve actually been on it since last fall. So I hopped on today, as part of my “ My thyroid sucks and so does my skating so I need to be sure all my other stuff, including diet and recovery workouts, is as perfect as it can be so that I’m not limiting my progress any more than my stupid thyroid already is” plan. So I get on the Wii, and first of all, it doesn’t tell me how long it’s been since I’ve Wii’d. The Wii ALWAYS tells me how long it’s been. All I can think of is that maybe it can’t count that high….

So then I do the body composition and balance test stuff. My Wii is happy to tell me that I’ve gained 10 pounds since I last stepped foot on it (damn thyroid). My balance tests were average—one was better than my previous, one was worse. And yet my WiiFit age was…wait for it….30.

Now remember, I’m 47. I don’t think I’ve ever had a WiiFit age under 34 or so. And yet, 10 pounds heavier and no improvement in balance tests—and I’m suddenly 30.

So Billy lied and made me do more work than he said he would. Wii lied and told me I'm getting younger.

I think I'll stick with Wii.