Granite Games Masters Sectionals WOD 1: "WHAT to bar pullups?!"

The Granite Games Masters Sectional WOD 1, like WOD 3, was fairly straightforward:  a 10 minute AMRAP (As Many Reps As Possible) of 30 wall ball shots, and 7 chest to bar pullups.

Wait...what to bar?  I could barely get my chin above the bar two weeks ago in the Online Qualifier--and now you want me to get my chest to the bar?  Clearly, I was looking at a score of 30 for this WOD.  I figured I would complete my first 30 wall ball shots and then spend the balance of the 10 minutes flailing around like a beached crappie in desperate--and futile--kip attempts.

I did get some good advice for tackling the WOD, though.  At the end of this morning's WOD 3 session, as we all sat around sweating, Coach Pat--who is competing in the Masters Sectionals and had just put on a very impressive clean-and-jerk performance--delivered this sage advice.

"What you want to do for chest-to-bar pullups," he said, "is stuff your bra."

Um...

"Yeah, the less distance you have to go, the better.  At least a padded bra...or maybe two...."

Uh, all right, I'll take that into consideration...

That advice notwithstanding, I figured it would be a good idea to at least try a chest-to-bar before the WOD.  Just, you know, to confirm that I couldn't do it.  So I asked Coach Jason if he would watch my attempt and give me suggestions.

"Sure," he said, "but there are no magic tricks for this one." (He must not have heard of Coach Pat's idea.)  "You just have to get stronger."

Damn.  While I'm definitely getting stronger, clearly not enough of that was going to be happening in the half hour before my turn to tackle the WOD.  But I jumped up anyway and gave it a try.

Kip.  Pull.

Nope.  I had a good foot or so more to go to get my chest to the bar.

But then someone suggested I try an underhand ("chinup") grip. So I did.

Kip.  Pull.

And a nod and a "yup, that was one" from Coach Jason.

Holy carp, I actually did a chest-to-bar pullup!

And then, after a bit of a scuffle with the technology required to video two people doing the WOD--both of whom needed to be seen both at the wall ball wall and when hanging from the rig, and both of whom also needed to have a timer visible in the frame but the timer was on the wrong wall, necessitating a timer download onto my iPad--we were ready to go.

I've done "Rx" weight (not "scaling" by using a lighter weight) wall balls exactly once, and I remembered that it took a full body effort--including actually jumping--for me to get the ball over the nine foot line.  Wall ball shots require that you go into a full squat with each attempt; failing to squat below parallel, failing to hit the wall, or hitting the wall below the line all constitute the dreaded "no rep" and will not be counted.  (Jumping is optional.)

The first 10 wall ball shots went fine; in fact, I think I actually did 15 unbroken.  Then the wheels came off a bit and I had some issues: a couple "no rep" shots; several where I caught the ball low (instead of up in the "ready to go again" position) and had to reposition before I could throw again; a couple of overly-long pauses to breathe; and one of those fun throws where you don't quite catch the ball and get 14 pounds of vinyl-covered wall ball to the nose.

Feet off the ground.  I'm still in wall ball Hell while the guy doing

the WOD at the same time as I am has advanced to

chest-to-bar Hell.

And then all 30 wall ball shots were done and it was on to the pullups.

To cut to the chase...I did all seven of them.

True, it took quite a bit of time, some lengthy pauses between attempts, and several "no reps"--but I got through them all--once again demonstrating some truly, um, unique technique.

I seem to remember being told that one's feet should remain together and 

relatively still during a kip.  Oh, well...

No, his shirt is not exhorting you to do something lewd and 

biologically impossible; remember, some of the SISU shirts

say "unsuck yourself"

Then it was back to the wall balls.  Since I truly had not expected to be picking up the ball for a second set of 30, neither body nor brain were quite up to speed at the start of the second set.  Coach Jason, who was counting reps for me (and occasionally "no repping" with great vigor) told me to get 10 and then rest.  So, with a couple of pauses and a "no rep" or two, I struggled through the first 10 wall ball shots...and then dropped the ball and went to the pullup rig.

Oops.

Once I had been hauled back to the wall to finish the remaining 20 wall ball shots, things progressed slowly.  My forearms were pretty tired by this time, so catching the ball in the ready position and then dropping immediately into the squat for the next rep was becoming impossible.  I got a lot of "no reps" (I haven't watched the video yet, but an audible cuss word or two might have sneaked in there during some particularly frustrating attempts), but I finally finished the second set of 30 and went back to the rig.

That line is looking mighty far overhead at this point...

I made a couple more attempts at chest-to-bars, but despite kicking and flailing and using pretty much any muscles I had left (whether they should actually be involved in chest-to-bars or not), I was unable to get any more reps.  So I ended with a score of 67...and the very satisfying feeling of knowing that, once again, I had achieved something that just an hour ago I would have said was completely impossible.

Not bad for a Thursday evening.